Sunday, April 3, 2016

Road to Nationals - Week 21 and 22: You break because you're broken.



This is going to be a relatively short post today because it's been a pretty sluggish last two weeks. Training has been rough simply because the rest of my life has been a whirlwind. It's just what happens when you chase chaos. Sometimes you're the hammer. Sometimes you're the nail.

What I'm getting at is this: If you don't take care of yourself, you're going to break down. More importantly, if you don't know what, "taking care of yourself" means, then you're in even bigger trouble.

What I'm learning is that as I grow older, there is far less room for error. You can't train on 5 hours of sleep. (Well... you can, but it won't be as productive, and you're far more likely to eventually get injured, yah dig?).

Moreover, as you grow older, you sure as hell can't fool around as much. Things like bracing during movement have always mattered, but when it's harder for you to recover, it matters even more.

See video 1:


This is 345 for 5. It felt great. I was well rested and I was under my competition weight. Life was good. I was eating clean. I have no complaints about this (aside from getting used to getting the bar lower on my back).

Now take a look at this:


This is 10 days later. I'm 4 pounds heavier, and this is my second set at 355 for 3. In the other video the barbell only has 10 pounds less on it.

In both videos, I feel like my movement is pretty fluid. I also feel like my speed is consistent. However, after the second video (the red-shirt video), I felt like my lower back was going to explode, and I was exhausted. That 355 might as well have been 405.

I've attributed the shit feeling of the movement to 3 things: (1) Lack of sleep. (2) Poor nutrition (I had been on a steady diet of Reese peanut butter eggs, and that weekend we were out until 5 AM in DC with friends), (3) A lack of bracing.

I get into conversations all the time about why people "don't train like they used to," and they blame it on getting old. They blame it on "life." They make excuses. The truth is, they don't really want to get better - and they will continue to break because they are already broken. Because it's hard to get 8-10 hours of sleep when you're 31 with a mortgage. And it's hard to eat right when you're "always out." And it's hard to brace and stretch and cool down because "it takes too long."

... But as long as you're broken, you'll continue to break.


Saturday, March 19, 2016

Road to Nationals - Week 19 and Week 20: All Aboard The Struggle Bus




This is what failure looks like... wait for it:



The worst part about this lift is that most people can't see what's really wrong with it, and a lot of it has to do with glute activation (an inconvenient truth I was, at first, reluctant to admit). All in all, the first rep looks pretty damn good. It's at 405, which is 80% of my 1RM. The goal was to pull all 5 reps without a belt...

That didn't happen. Here are the final 2 reps of the 2nd set:


They both felt really good in teh second video, but I'm sure you're seeing what I'm seeing. The back rounds slightly (or at least it appears to because of the belt).

I've always felt this way: I'm good for a single pull off of the floor. Because I struggle with glute activation, I tend to use a lot of lower back. With a belt for a single pull, I'm still pretty good for big numbers (if I can hit 525 by June, I'll be happy). However, put 455 on the bar and ask me to pull it for 3 and we're going to have a problem.

I finished the first week of the second phase of my 10 week squat cycle, and I'm pretty happy with where things are going. Thanks to a crap ton of T-Spine mobility work, my low-bar squatting has been feeling great (I was worried when I first started).

In other news, these exist:



Here's to another week-long struggle. Looking forward to what's ahead. 30 weeks out from Nationals in Atlanta, and I'm looking to total 1300# by the time it's all said and done. Let's rock and roll.

Be well,
C

Saturday, March 5, 2016

Road to Nationals - Week 17 and 18: What it takes to be a journeyman



... as per ole' faithful, Wikipedia:

"journeyman is an individual who has completed an apprenticeship and is fully educated in a trade or craft, but not yet a master. To become a master, a journeyman has to submit a master work piece to a guild for evaluation and be admitted to the guild as a master."

I've been searching for the right words to define this experience, and it was only recently that I stumbled upon something that resonated with me.

Last night, a buddy of mine smoked a personal best in the clean and jerk. For those who have taken up weightlifting as a hobby or serious sport, the quest for 315 (the sacred 3 plates), is an elusive one.

Josh is a hero of mine.

And as a tradesman by day, I couldn't help but think of how much I liked the idea of being a journeyman. It's a good one.

We're all on that journey. And when I think about that "education in a trade or craft," I can't help but think that many of us, especially the savages I train with week to week, are very much so in the thick of that sacred conquest for medals and records and glory. We're all Journeymen.

Here's the video (It's a thing of beauty.).





Journey Notes: 

I just finished up week 3 of my new program. It's looking week 4 is going to be pretty miserable; lots of 4x4 work at about 80%. My coach's notes say RPE should be somewhere around 8/9. I'm excited to see how, exactly, my body responds to low-bar squatting at 80%. So far, it's felt pretty good. Moreover, it's been beltless, and I'm planning on hitting this 80% beltless, too.

The following week is looking like a de-load week, and then I'm back on another 4 weeks to finish off this squat cycle.

Then, I've got a 10-week bench cycle. That cycle should run me right into my meet on June 5th. After that, I'll be hitting a 10-week deadlift cycle, and that should put me 2 months out from Nationals in Atlanta.

Established goals (subject to only get more aggressive):

National Total: 1300 (should place me top 10)

Squat: 450
Deadlift: 535
Bench: 315

That's all I got for you, folks. Follow Josh on Instagram HERE.

Be well,
C



Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Road To Nationals: Week 16: This is why you're weak




When I first started Crossfitting back in 2010 at Crossfit Tribe (Rest In Peace), we used to meet up every Sunday to work on our weaknesses, and we always had such a grand old time.

I remember looking in the mirror before leaving the house and thinking, "I suck at overhead squats. I suck at snatching. I suck at... everything?"

And I can't help but think about how much I've grown as an athlete since then.

Because when we talk about "weaknesses," sometimes it can become a labyrinthian quest of sorts.

Because there is a difference between having a weakness and being weak.

I'm writing it again:

There is a difference between having a weakness and being weak.

Truthfully, life is pretty easy when you're plain, old fashioned weak.

Ultimately, what it means is that you just have to sack up: Push more. Pull more. Follow (literally) any program. You'll be fine (and dare I say that maybe this is some advice for life, too?).

Think about it:

If you can't squat double your bodyweight. You just need to squat more; you don't need a coach to tell you what's wrong with your squat.

If you can't clean your body weight. You just need to push and pull more. You don't need a coach to tell you what's wrong with your clean.

Your only weakness is that you're weak...

Looking back, I remember beating myself up about my clean for a while in those early years of my training.

"Why can't I clean 225?"

Insert Inner Monologue: You're having a hard time cleaning 225 because you can't even front squat 225. Idiot.

Now, I only clean maybe 3-4 times a year (#strugglesofpowerlifting), and I weigh the same...

But I can clean 225 from the hip for a triple because my front squat is 330 and I can deadlift 500lbs.

Life gets easy when you're stronger.

... until you start to realize that you have legitimate weaknesses...

Note: I also know how to clean.

The Truth 

After several email exchanges with my coach, despite making great strength gains as we work through programming leading up to 2016 Nationals, he dropped some pretty serious news on me:

I'm broken.

I don't mean to sound melodramatic, but it's true. I am. It's why my chest falls in the squat. It's why my lower back rounds in my deadlift. It's why I'm not very strong overhead.

I'm not weak by any means, but it's very apparent that I have weaknesses that need correcting.

With that being said, over the next several weeks, expect to see videos like the one below:




The first depressing thing about starting a new program after two weeks of eating whatever I want: My belly is back. And it sucks. However, it's to be expected. I could focus on dieting down and hitting cardio and doing whatever else I need to do to look better in front of a mirror, but it's a slippery slope, and for right now, I'd rather focus on the OTHER weakness...

The focus here is on the lower back. Coach Kev more or less told me that despite pulling that 500, I'm a time-bomb if my back keeps rounding. Because of this, you can expect to see me resetting in my deadlifts and performing A LOT of mobility/preactivation/isolation work.

Note: It's not fun, and it doesn't look cool. Nobody cares about how well you pull 70%. And nobody cares about working on glute activation or T-spine work.

But my body cares; and I can't set a record or podium at Nationals if I'm out because a disk exploded or my pec came unglued.

Welcome to the next 33 weeks, folks.

Here's to being weak and fighting weakness.

All Best,
C




Sunday, February 14, 2016

Road To Nationals: Week 14 and 15 - About Resting, Writing, and having fun.







When I first started The Poet and The Platform, I took the time throughout several early posts to discuss my journey so far as a writer, hence the "Poet" portion of the title. Last week, on Radio 104.5 Philadelphia's PODCAST with Wendy Rollins and Paul Nance called Alter Natives, I had the opportunity to talk a bit about what that title means, why I write, and what it means to be a writer (I also got to geek out about the Pop Punk scene).

Apparently, I'm not just some power-lifter bro who likes to yell and lift things...

But let's be fair; a large part of me is still very much so just that haha.

So yeah, about writing:

I've been doing it for a VERY long time, and as I have recently just rounded over the age of 30 and gracefully made my way to 31, what I've realized is that I've been a writer for half of my life.

From fiction to creative non-fiction to slam poetry to pop songs to hardcore, I think it's safe to say that I've dabbled in just about all of it. Hell, I've even had the opportunity to write copy for various brands (*shadow high five to Don Draper* - SEE: Heavy Rep Gear ). Overall, it's been a great run.

But when people ask me about writing, there's always that question of, "So what have you been up to?" and then I say, "Writing," and then there's the question of, "About what?" and then I have to be self-absorbed and slightly pretentious and say, "Everything."

But it's true.

Because that's the only thing that can really keep you writing and motivated and optimistic. You stop, you die. It's that simple. When I say that I write about everything in every way, I mean it. It keeps the blade sharp. No one wants to stake a fighter who hasn't thrown a punch in years. So I write. Even this thing right here, this blog, has some work thrown into it. I write this to keep me sharp. I play around with sentence structure and diction and commas (or the lack thereof), and I try to keep a mental note. (Craft and structure matters, people. It's an art). And when I'm not writing, I'm reading. I'm reading blogs and articles and reviews and fiction and nonfiction and poetry and whatever else I can get my hands on.

Because no one wants a fighter who hasn't thrown a punch in a few years.

Writing is an aggressively messy practice, and if you're too afraid to get dirty, then it's not for you. But if you're down to make a mess like nobody's business...



... then full speed ahead.

When I did the pod cast two nights ago (Again, here is the link: http://www.radio1045.com/onair/off-the-air-wendy-rollins-36114/podcast-alter-natives-14353628/ ), I spent some time talking about a band called The Dangerous Summer, and I felt like I needed to share their first record with you all. I'd forgotten about it for a while and then picked it back up again for one reason or another... what a great decision that was:



This is the only song I could post to YouTube for some reason, but give it a listen and then check out the rest of the album.

As for the Podcast, Wendy and Paul will be doing shows weekly, and I cannot stress this enough: Listen to it, especially if you're a fan of music. I can promise you that you will find a few pieces of yourself buried in the awesome discussion that happens on that show.

A few notes on training:

Over the last two weeks, I've been having some fun with my training. I'd originally attempted to hit a workout called King Kong with a buddy of mine, but that fell through (#bourbon). Take a look at the video below to get an idea of what the workout entails. It's a throw-back video of Josh Everett doing it in like 3 minutes...



"I snatched 255 and clean and jerked 335 earlier today, so I guess that's like... a warm up."

Shut up, Josh.

A few notes about personal highlights: I managed to do strict FRAN in 10 minutes (my PR is 7:30). The video below isn't of me, but if  you have no idea what I'm talking about, it gives you a decent idea of the workout. It's 21/15/9 reps of thrusters at 95# and strict pull-ups.


I felt like I was dying in a fire by the time I was done, and I was coughing for the next two days.

The following day, me, my coach, and a few buddies did an assault bike workout, too. That was miserable. Note the worst 3 minutes of your life: Max rep bench press @ your bodyweight. Then, 30 seconds max calorie on an assault bike. Rest 2-3 minutes. Repeat for 3 rounds. My buddy first suggested 10... then 5... but we eventually pulled the break at 3 rounds because we legitimately didn't want to die.

In other news:

I cleaned 250# for 3 singles. That was nice.
I snatched 155# for a single. That was cool.
I fooled around with a low-bar back squat and managed to smoke 295# for 3 with a 2-second pause in the hole.
I hit a 3 position clean at 225#.

A  bit about de-load/off weeks:

At the end of the day, I train because I like to move and I think it's fun. If I wasn't making a run at nationals, I would probably do more of what you see above. It keeps the mind, body, and soul fresh. It also makes me feel like a god damn savage when I can carry a heavy, 30-inch bathroom vanity by myself from my car into my house alone. #reallife

I should be getting my program on Monday. Coach is changing things up a bit. It's looking like a 10-week squat cycle is on deck. See you all on the other side.

Be well,
C



Sunday, January 31, 2016

Road to Nationals - Week 13: Maxing out



Hey all,

Below you can find some videos from this week's max-out attempts:

Squat:

I was very disappointed with my squat performance. I "opened" with a 395 squat that felt pretty light, but for some reason, things fell off the rails shortly after. Below you can find the 405 attempt. Though I make the lift, it felt way heavier than I would have liked it to be...



My chest falls forward and then I have to correct myself. What a mess...

The next two videos are at 415. I don't want to consider these "made" lifts (especially not the second one, yuck), because of my brother's help about mid-way out of the hole. Maybe (especially for the first video below), I could have gutted it out without him there, but who knows...





Ultimately, I've got work to do. I think my stance was a bit too narrow (causing the falling chest), and I really do need to do something about how high that barbell is on my back. I'm not an Olympic lifter... so it really is unnecessary. All things consistent, if I just switch over to a more low-bar style and I can put some pounds on my total, so be it.

Squat = 405.


Deadlift:

I don't have any video of it because I had to lift at my high school's weight room (scheduling to lift was crazy this week). However, the good news is that I was able to PR. I am now proudly a part of the 500lb club. It's a far cry from what a lot of the top-tier lifters are pulling (close to 600) in my weight class, but I'm getting there.

Deadlift = 500.


Bench:

I'm really proud of these bench attempts. When I first started on this journey, I knew that my bench was my limiting factor. In a little over a year of serious training, I've been able to put almost 75lbs onto my bench. With that being said, I understand that the road ahead is going to be brutal. I don't think I'll be making jumps like that anymore (I've settled into thinking that putting on 30lbs a year would be great). I'd only hoped to bench 275, but it felt really light, so below you can see videos for 285 and 290.





Bench = 290.


Total:

Squat: 405
Bench: 290
Deadlift: 500
New Unofficial Total: 1195

A few words:

Things like this are bitter-sweet. I didn't make my squat attempts at 415, so that's a bummer, and though I now have those numbers under my belt, they weren't all done on the same day and the lifts sure as hell weren't all done during a meet. I don't care about what anyone says, on the platform under the lights is WAY different from lifting with your buddies at the gym up the road.

The new goal, now, is to make these numbers at the meet on June 5th. However, it's going to be a grind. In a perfect world, with the right programming, I'm hoping to put another 10lbs on each lift by June, so we'll see how it goes. Had I totaled this in the fall at Nationals, I would have placed 15th, so I'm excited to see what's to come of me by October. Though I'm fairly certain a 1300lbs total is a bit of a longshot, if I want to place top ten, that's where I will need to be. Moreover, if I want to podium for 2017, it's looking like I'll have to be damn close to a 1400lb total.

Next week is looking like a rest week, so I'll be taking a week off from blogging as well (unless the spirit catches me).

Be well,
C

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Road to Nationals: Week 12 - Knowing when to bow out, and knowing when to dig in...



What's good, people!?

No videos. No Competition. No nothing.

I know; riveting. Let me explain:

About two months ago, I signed up for a competition in North Jersey, The USAPL New Jersey Winter War. I was looking forward to a mid-year competition in an attempt to better improve my overall national ranking going into Nationals this Fall but, as many of you are well aware, Mother Nature had other plans.

The blizzard that wreaked havoc all along the North East more or less put New Jersey to a standstill. Though I had every intention competing, and after a long afternoon and an early morning of shoveling out my car (for the second time), and after an offer was made by the meet director to carry my registration (and anyone else's) to another meet because of the state of emergency, I decided to bow out and take him up on his offer.

When I woke up at 6:30AM this morning, I still had every intention of competing, despite being pretty exhausted; but after another hour of shoveling (thanks, winter), I realized something pretty profound:

You're an idiot. 

Wait. I mean... I'm not talking to you, the  reader. What I meant was that I was talking to myself (It was one of those introspective, self-talk sort of things).

But about why I (and maybe you?) may be an idiot...

It's not all that complicated.

To think that you can put yourself into a caloric deficit, dehydrate yourself in an attempt to lose weight, and THEN shovel snow for several hours, sleep (poorly), wake up early to shovel again for an hour, sit in a car for two, and STILL be able to pull off personal bests in a competition is out-right foolish. What I realized was that I would rather save my body, eat a little, and then head to the gym to smoke some PRs, especially since I can save the $100 and put it towards a meet in the summer (fingers crossed for no blizzards) than risk bombing out, hitting disappointing numbers, or getting injured.

I could have easily said screw it, hopped in the car, and made it to the meet, but for what? Pride?

Was it a national level meet? No.
Have I already qualified for nationals? Yes.
Was I going to break a state record? No.
Could I have potentially gotten injured / overtrained / bombed out: Yes.

Had I won the meet (and beaten the OTHER guy... meaning that there were only 2 of us in the weight class), I would have had, more or less, a participation trophy. This isn't a Tough Mudder. No one cares about the guy who "showed up and tried really hard."

For most people, this is a non-issue. Of course. Don't go. Who Cares?

But for people who like to compete, this quite the heartbreaker.

At the end of the day, though, putting pride, desire, and spite aside, this is a marathon, and you can't buy days on the calendar. Every day you don't make the most of what you need to is another day you fall behind.

NOTE: Sometimes, bowing out is smarter than digging in.

Be well, Warrior Poets.

All best,
C

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Road to Nationals Week 11 and a bit on how/why you get injured...

Hey all,

Below you can find my most recent training video. I wanted to show the video first so we can talk about a few things:


What you're seeing is an attempt at 96% (470) for 3.

If I REALLY wanted to, I could have gutted out that last rep... but I didn't.

I decided that if I was going to get injured (and I was well enough on that road, for sure... even after the first rep), I was going to save it for the platform next Sunday. Nobody wants to be the guy who says, "Yeah, I was going to compete, but I got injured... training."

There is a time and a place for everything, and if it isn't for a record, for a qualifying total, a medal, or a competition PR, then I don't think it's ever the time or place.

With all that being said, I've been under a lot of stress recently, and I also haven't been sleeping all that well. I've been under-eating, for sure (because that's what you need to do if you want to lose 10lbs...), and at week 11 of my training cycle, my body is finally telling me that enough is enough. Couple that with shit pulling form like you see above, and one poor decision in training could send me off the rails.

People like to poke fun at those who videotaping their training, but most of those people are either weak, stupid, insecure, or a healthy combination of all 3.

We don't film our lifts because they look cool. We film our lifts for healthy analysis. What did I do right? What did I do wrong? If you watch the clip above, I did plenty wrong. Luckily, I know how to fix it. Unfortunately, I won't be able to fix it in a week's time, so it's going to be a battle I have to fight after I take a few weeks off from the meet and get back into a program. Think about that. I'm looking at something right now that I may not have the time to fix until mid-February. But, alas, that's the discipline.

At the end of the day, though, if you don't reflect on these things pretty frequently, you're never going to get as strong as you could (should?) be.

Take Aways: 


  • If you aren't sleeping, you aren't recovering (get off of your phone while you're in bed, people... unless you want to die young... ). 
  • If you are putting yourself in a caloric deficit, it's going to be difficult to get strong, stay strong, and stay healthy if you are training at near-maximal loads often (Off season, you should be fine. But in-season, you can't eat like a bodybuilder and train like a powerlifter. Where bodybuilders are often at their weakest when they step on the stage for a show, a powerlifter needs to be at their strongest). 
  • It's NEVER okay to break form. However, sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do in order to make that number. Don't be "that guy," who has more training injuries than he has competition attempts. 
  • Film yourself and break down your attempts in an attempt to get better. Throwers (shot put/discuss/javelin/weight/hammer) do it ALL the time for good reason. You should be doing it as well. If you don't know where your shoulders should be at the point the barbell breaks from the ground in the deadlift, there's a problem. If you don't know what "below parallel" feels like, there's a problem. If you don't know whether or not your heel rocks up off the floor while you're bench-pressing (it shouldn't), there's a problem. 

I know there are a few meets coming up in the tri-state area over the next few weeks, so for those who are competing, good luck! For those of you who aren't competing but would like to start and have a few questions, shoot me a message, and for those of you who have never put a barbell in your hands but are toying with the idea of starting, I'd love to be a part of your journey, so hit me up. 

All best,
C





Saturday, January 9, 2016

Road To Nationals Week 10 and how I plan to bring in the New Year...






Not DeadYet, indeed. Thanks, Frank Turner, for everything...


Three years ago, I read John Welbourn's 2013 "Year in Review" and felt inspired.

Maybe it was the simplicity of his list of "42 things" he learned that year; maybe it was because I was at a point in my life where I felt like I'd been let down by just about everything I'd bought into since my teenage years; but I'd felt swindled, and after reading it, I was excited to move on toward something of substance.

But what I learned from his post, at the end the day, was one simple truth: I was doing everything wrong. 

I want to say that, after reading his review, I was so inspired that I was able to eliminate every hindrance that existed in my world, but that would be a lie. Things actually got worse. I went into that year thinking more was better. I told myself, well, I just needed to do things that I enjoyed doing more often, and then maybe things would work out. I thought, "Turn everything up to 11 and let's ride this thing until the wheels fall off," but by the end of 2013, I found my self worse off than the year before.

The problem was, I thought that I needed to "do more". I thought that since I liked to coach and I liked to play music and I liked to write and I liked to teach and I liked to help people and I liked to travel and I liked to train and I liked money, I should keep working towards all of those things...

But here is what happened: All I did was make myself more miserable to the point of feeling physically ill most days, and by the summer of 2014, I found myself still at a loss.

It wasn't until a family a trip to the Bahamas, the reading of a book called The Great Floodgates of the Wonderworldan email to the author (who has since become a friend... thanks, Justin, for everything), and the writing of my first book (something that took me several years to put together), that I'd finally found myself on steadier ground.

It was a combination of those events and a third "Year in Review" by Welbourn called "Lessons Learned" that finally set me on the course that I feel I'm still on today (and much happier than I've ever been).

And all of it came together rather nicely on January 2nd, 2015, when I read the first item on Welbourn's list:

"You make your own prisons in life."

Below you can read the complete section:

          If 20 bucks or 60 minutes a day is what is preventing you from reaching your goals, get a new job or set an alarm clock. You have to make time for it. No goal was ever attained by just thinking about. No amount of dreaming gets your ass in shape.
           I have a good friend that runs one of the largest mortgage companies in the country with a few hundred offices with a ½ billion in revenue. He has 3 kids, a wife and works 70 hours a week. Then wakes up at 4 AM to train each day and hasn’t missed a day of training since 2005. He made the New Year’s resolution to not miss a day of training, which means 365 days a year of workouts, for a full year. Each year since 2005, he has made the same resolution and has kept it.
           If it is important, you will find a way to make it happen. If $20 is the difference between success and failure, ride a bike, skip the bar one night a month, or brew your coffee at home and save the $1.45 at Starbucks.
           If meeting your goals by fitting in your training into your busy schedule means you have to wake up at 4 AM to get in your training, throw away your TV and go to bed.
           Because there are thousands of people meeting their goals by prioritizing what is important, waking up early and making it work. I always smile when I see a video of a guy squatting in his home garage gym at 5 AM with snow on the ground.
           Whining about 20 bucks makes you sound like an unsuccessful fucking loser. And complaining you can’t find 60 minutes a few days a week to train makes you sound like a lazy incompetent fuck.
Poetic, I know, but it resonated with me. On January 2, 2015, I'd realized something: I was STILL doing everything wrong. 

What I'd realized (and maybe you've already realized this ), was that I was completely responsible for building the world that I wanted to exist in. I'm sure many of you are reading this now and you're thinking, "Duh. That's obvious," but is it? Take a look at your bank account - are your finances exactly where you would like them to be? What about your job? Are you in love with it? Is it providing you with purpose? Your body? Is it complete? Your health? Is it as good as it should be?

I could go on like this for hours, and I'm not doing it to sound like I know what I'm talking about. I'm just going on-record to say that I'm just as lost as the next guy and that, for a very long time, I was not completely certain what it was that made me feel whole or happy; however, with that being said, I can confidently say that after 2015, I have a better idea of what I value and why.

In the spirit of the New Years list, I've decided to put one together. It's a gift from me to you (or more like a gift from me to me, but you get the idea) to better help you find your way:

1.) Figure out what it is that makes you feel complete: Notice that I DID NOT say "happy." I've grown to detest that word. True happiness is a byproduct of wholeness. False happiness is a byproduct of some sort of chemical interruption. For a brief moment, even the saddest heroin addict feels just dandy about most things. Because of that, I insist upon feeling complete and whole. Find out what leads you in that direction, and most of the work is already done.

2.) It's okay to be selfish so long as you're feeding the right parts of yourself: Understand that I am not, in any way, saying "do whatever you want and screw everyone else." If that's what you're hearing in your mind when you read this, then you've been reading too many 140 character blobs on the internet written by people who are worse off than you are. What I mean by selfishness is the work you're doing to complete yourself. For example, if you ditch your friends out of laziness or you cancel plans because you think more enjoyable ones are on the horizon, you're an asshole. However, if you ditch your friends because something came up, and now you have to work towards that whole "completeness" thing on their time, well then, in my mind, the sacrifice is understandable. You build your own prison, remember? If a night out could result in taking you two steps backward, then do what you need to do.

3:) Surround yourself with Warrior Poets: Stolen from the film Braveheart, I've been using this term a lot recently. Warrior Poets are people who understand you completely because they are on the same journey you are on. They, too, are searching to complete themselves, and they understand the sacrifices and decisions you make without having to ask a single thing of you. They "get it," and the more of these people you have in your life, the better.

4:) Lead by example: "Be the change you want in the world." Don't be the guy or girl who "knows people" who have done X or Y. Don't be the "second hand" expert. At worst, you sound like a pretentious asshole. At best, you can't honestly empathize or understand. People can smell inauthenticity a mile away.

5:) Eliminate distractions and white noise: I made mention that several years ago, I'd found that I'd run myself ragged in an attempt to do all the things that I enjoyed doing in an attempt to find happiness. This happened because I had a hard time finding focus, and much of that has to do with the fact that I was almost always distracted. I was distracted with parties and distracted with dreams and distracted with ideas of how I'd like the world to exist. I couldn't work toward becoming whole because I couldn't focus on what it was that made me whole. I was too busy hoping and searching and experimenting. I was chasing after that damned thing, happiness. I'm not saying "don't experiment." However, I am saying know the difference between an experiment and a waste of time.

6:) Know the difference between being negative and demanding progress: It's okay to criticize, just understand that you'd better have a solution. If you have a possible alternative with thoughtful progress in mind, well then you're well on your way, and everyone else can go to hell. However, if you're just criticizing because you feel like what you have to say is important; trust me, it isn't. You're just being an asshole, and what you're complaining about isn't anything new. If anything, you're just opening up old wounds. Want to matter? Help. Don't have the time? Then quiet down, carry on, and mind your own damn business.

7:) You can't change the past, so get over it and move on. Grudges are for losers. You can absolutely use negativity to motivate you. As a matter of fact, I insist upon it. However, don't lose your focus. When people hold grudges, they let that other thing (whether it be a person or an institution) gobble up too much of their energy. Focus on the goal and use negativity as a means to reflect. If you're driving alone at night and all you can think about is the person or thing that's hindering your progress and NOT the progress itself, you've got bigger problems on your hands, and those problems all have to do with what's going on inside your soul and the demons that reside there.

8:) Take care of yourself. I mean it: Growing up, my mother always used to remind me and my brother to take our vitamins. That habit has paid dividends. I'm rarely ever sick, and I've never suffered a major injury, despite competing in powerlifting, Crossfit, and Olympic Lifting competitions. A lot of that has to do with how much I sleep, what I eat, what I drink, and paying thoughtful attention to those things as often as I can.

9:) Admit that you have a lot to learn, even about things you think you strongly understand: "He, O men, is the wisest, who like Socrates, knows that his wisdom is, in truth, worth nothing." - I can't say it as beautifully as Plato, but it's still worth pondering. Also, buy something written by Marcus Aurelius and spend a night inside. You don't have to go crazy with the reading, but it's worth your time, I promise.

A final note:

When it all falls down, you're only left with the things inside your soul that permit you to rest easy. I still have ways to go, and maybe I have no business putting together this list in the first place, but the act of putting words to paper helps.

Moreover, do yourself a favor and make a list of your own. Think about what you did last year, both good and bad. Prioritize. Reflect. Plan.

Take a look at my lists below...

The things that needed to take a back-seat in 2015 (and carry into 2016): 
  1. Drinking alcohol
  2. Traveling
  3. Buying clothes
  4. Going out to dinner
  5. Working more than 50 hours a week
  6. Chasing money (goodbye, third job)
  7. My role as "A Coach"
  8. Hanging out frequently with people I see frequently
  9. Playing video games
  10. Watching a television series. 
  11. Performing music out at venues/events/bars
The things that I realized needed to take priority in 2015 (and to carry into 2016): 
  1. Reading. A lot. 
  2. Writing frequently for a set amount of time (2 hours one night during the work week, 4 hours every weekend) 
  3. Writing music
  4. Recording music
  5. Keeping in contact with people
  6. Following a training program to the letter 
  7. Seeing a sports chiropractor monthly
  8. Prehab and Rehab (stretch, roll, turn, walk, pull, hinge, repeat)
Accomplished goals of 2015:
  1. Qualify for USA Powerlifting National Championship
  2. Compete at USA Powerlifting National Championship and total over 1150
  3. Finish writing second book
  4. Begin writing third book
  5. Begin recording and writing music again. 
Goals of 2016:
  1. Place in the top 10 at USA Powerlifting National Championships
  2. Total 1250
  3. Bench  during training 315
  4. Squat during training 450
  5. Deadlift during training 550
  6. Secure a publishing agent
  7. Sell a song
Even looking at this these lists now, I can still see that I have work to do. Maybe I have to refocus. Maybe I have to get rid of a goal for 2016. Maybe I have to add a goal. Maybe I need to reprioritize. Ultimately, though, putting words to paper is what matters. It makes me re-evaluate how I spend my money, how I spend my time, and who I spend it with.

Oh, and there is one other thing to add to this list...

Stop blogging.

You read that right. Alas, I must walk away from this beast.

Don't worry, though. I'll still use this as a training log. I'll still post videos and discuss how, exactly, I feel for the week, but no more pontificating. No more lists (haha). No more nonsense.

If I want to publish fiction, then I need to be spending my time writing fiction, yah dig? Don't get me wrong, I'd like very much to be paid doing this, but I haven't burned myself out on the former task. It's just too damn fun.

A week or so ago, a buddy of mine asked me what I would do every day if I was filthy rich. "If you could get paid handsomely to do anything at all... if you could do what you love doing every day, what would you do?"

My answer?

Write... and train. The training, believe it or not, helps me grind out the ideas. It's amazing what you think about when there's 180kg bearing down on your back most nights.

And with that... good night, good luck, and happy New Year.

All my best,

C.

Here are some new training videos. I'll see you all next week.

Pulled 460 for 4. Still a little more round than I'd like to be, but I'm working on it.



This is a huge bench PR for me. Here is 255 for 6 at a touch-and-go pace (My competition PR is only 260, so I'm looking to smash it on the 24th.)